This is about the nightime kind, not the lifetime kind, so if you don’t care, stop reading now.

In a quick new blurb, Jay Leno (who may single-handedly be responsible for the hole in the ozone layer) apparently has the original tank of gas in his Chevy Volt.  Even though it has 11,000 miles on it.

The first question you’re likely asking is “Why is Lee J awake at 0500 on a Saturday?”  The answer is a duesy (or doozy–depending on who you ask, apparently never the expected “doosie” though).

I was tired last night–go figure after my last two weeks–so I fell asleep about 2215.  And I woke up with so much bouncing around in my head that I couldn’t get back to sleep at 0415.  Too much to do today.

I think I had three or four main dream “streams”–the storyline that dreams follow.  Problem is, I can only remember one of them.  But it was good.  As we learn from Inception, we can’t really remember how we ended up somewhere.  Suddenly I was playing left back for my favourite football team, Tottenham Hotspur of the Barclay’s Premier League.

I got the distinct impression I was playing with the reserve team, so I wasn’t going to recognize any of the players (easier to populate the dream).  Also, I had no idea who we were playing.

Suddenly, instead of football, we were playing rugby–not a sport I’d ever play except in my dreams.  So as we passed the ball along our attacking line we suddenly we’re on just a pitch any more.  We were playing through a church building.  Specifically, we were playing through the building I met as a kid–or at least through the extended cultural hall.

This may combine a few things of my recent thought process with old images.  First of all, I have no idea why I projected the church over the pitch.  But i know exactly where the football and rugby come from.

Who wouldn’t want to play for their favourite football team?  That’s easy, but left back?  Lee J is a keeper–not a uncoordinated as this guy.  This took a little mental digging.  Tottenham’s left mid, Wales international Gareth Bale, is my favourite player.  Even though I knew I was playing with the reserves, I would play behind (formationally) Bale if I ever cracked the first team (and muscled Benoît Assou-Ekotto out of the starting XI).  So that would combine desires to play professional football with the ability to link up with Bale on overlapping runs.

But rugby? Really?  Yeah, definitely.  About four weeks ago I discovered the beauty of drop kicks as a method for distribution out of the goal–don’t blame me, I’m American and we don’t get taught football early.  Anyway, since I discovered I can easily blast balls (with varying amounts of accuracy) 50+ metres (I’ve scored three goals like this in games of 7 v 7) I’ve wondered what it would be like to play N˚ 10 on a rugby team like Johnny Wilkinson or be a kicker for an American football team.

Kicking long balls is fun.  After I get a Ph.D. I think it would be really fun to attempt walking on at a junior college as a kicker.  Just to see if I could do it.  I might need to train over the summer, but it would be a blast to try.

To take you out, I thought to educate you about how American football players aren’t the best kickers in the world.  Or even close.  Attempting to compate apples to apples, I’ve chosen the longest field goal ever kicked (Sebastian Janikowski, 63 yards) against the longest rugby drop goal I could find (François Steyn, 60 yards and more).  The drop goal speaks for itself. But both considered, the best kickers may be from Australia.

Best part about waking this early on a Saturday?  Catching the BPL match on ESPN2.

About the author: Lee J

Lee J Hinkle spends his days writing video game code. It was never a job he expected to have. Check out Rogue Invader online. Any search will send you to the right spot. Unless the language is foreign. Then maybe 50% will be right.

He tries to be a devout member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and hopes his Father recognizes his efforts.